How to love an African man in 12 steps
They don't come with an instruction manual but they ought to. One does not just see an African man, and just go and be loving him as if it was just an ordinary something. Bottom line if you don't do it correctly edges fall off, backside go drop, and love go done.
In this 2019 I don't want anyone to go and suffer for lack of proper training and preparation so let me give you the tools for successful African man loving. What I will put down here is the truth based on years of anthropological study, experience, and understanding.
If in a relationship with an African man focus on what is going on with just the two of you. What he is doing with other women in other places does not concern you. ”Who is she?” ”What is she to you?” Please are you FBI or his lover? You came to love not to interrogate. Love and mind your business.
When you have a disagreement, vex small but don't vex all. If you really love an African man you have to be forgiving of all things. Also do not go out with your girlfriends to turn up or leave the house. Love means you stay home and wait for him. Only after palava finish can you go out again.
On the occasion no matter how frequent he goes out please do not question his whereabouts. He is not a child. If he tells you where without you asking okay, if he doesn't that is not a problem. There are just two appropriate things you should say when he leaves: 1. Be safe out there 2. Enjoy yourself. Any other utterancess that are not positive and supportive in nature are not warranted.
Love and food go together. While some will say you must cook for them bottom line is it just matters that he eats. Who cooks the food whether na chop bar, cookery baffa, your mother, KFC, just check on his feeding and provide and support it regularly. If he is one of those who wants you in the kitchen arrange yourself pretend to cook while you have some one deliver the meal prepared to the house. What he doesn't know won't kill him. Just feed him.
If you love him like for real then collecting money from him when he has not offered it is not correct. Loving him means to free him from the tax of ”gimme gimme” and ”buy for me”. Love means you receive that which is offered but make no demands. In fact to love him means you have go shower him with gifts (you buy for him), and acts of service.
Should you find one of those very bookish ones, know that he prides himself in his degrees so loving him means admiring his accolades ever so often. When you are in a public debate or discussion, the expectation is that you must be on the same side. If you love him and he says yay! You say yay! If he says no! You too you say no. When you go home and you are in private where others can not hear then you are free to tell him why his position on the geo-political climate in West Africa is flawed.
If you love him by all means his enemies are now your enemies and his friends are now your friends. It is team us all day, everyday.
I don't think I really need to state this one but some of you ladies like to ”kip tik behind doh mot in case nehba dog go crase”. Meaning y’all always have side dudes in friend zone that you're encouraging with small flirtations here and there just in case your main man loses his damn mind. If you love an African man please stop this habit. This is the all or nothing love expectation. You're not to have any male friends or ex boyfriend lurking in your DMs or Whatsapp or Facebook or in Church.
When you close your eyes to pray the expectation is that you mention his name, pray for him, pray for his work place, pray for mother, his father, and everything about him. Commit him to God because you must finding blessings for your African love.
During sex make noise for him, to show you support him. Celebrate his performance because when you love an African man you must be supportive and you must encourage him. Also make sure you give him angles, as many as possible so he can bless you with his release because when you love you are there for him to release for you.
If he ever steals from his job be it a government job or private company you support him by cursing out the haters who snitched on him and the bad belleh people trying to bring a good man down. Love means even when he does his worst you are there to support him.
The truest manifestation of how you love him is the love you have for his family. Even if he is insulting them behind their back, you never insult them. If he stops speaking to anyone your job is to always be there to amend the situation. No matter what, you are team his family. He may never say but he will appreciate you always for that because deep inside he wants to be a better person even though he fails at it regularly.
That is all done and dusted. I have given you the instructions. You want you take. You want you noh take. Love on and prosper. It is well.