Writing Bra Spider stories for kids helps me with heartache during the #Covid19 pandemic

Yesterday on Facetime with my 4-year-old son who is on #stayathome in Accra, Ghana due to #Covid19 I was amazed at his joy. He and our nanny Charity were baking cookies. Before cookies, it was a meat pie. Like parents around the world, my child is out of school until further notice.

Unlike most parents, however, I am not in the same place to stay at home with him. He is with my mom in Ghana and I’m in our second home in Sierra Leone.

On March 12, I left Accra for Freetown on a business trip. By the time the two-hour flight landed in Sierra Leone, Ghana had announced its index case of Covid19. From there, things escalated fast. By March 19, the government of Sierra Leone announced that no flights would come in or out of Sierra Leone starting March 21. When this was announced I was still quite calm. My first thought was that I would at least be able to return to Ghana by road.

Less than a week after flights were banned for 90 days President Bio announced the closure of Sierra Leone’s land borders with Guinea and Liberia. That was on March 27. Four days later on March 31, Sierra Leone reported its index case of Covid19

Two weeks after leaving Ghana, it dawned on me that I would not be returning home anytime soon. So I called Olushola the 4-year-old and told him that the airports were closed, and the airplanes were parked. I told him that a lot of people were sick with Coronavirus. We talked about why we had to stay home and wash our hands because Coronavirus germs were making people sick.

In my mind, that conversation took place years ago but it has only been two weeks. In that short time, I feel my whole world has come to a standstill (just like you). It is not the separation that gets me, its the uncertainty. On many nights I cry, a mix of loneliness, anxiety, and heartache.

In the morning, I roll out of my bed and walk to my office and try to think about a story to write. A trip down memory lane about a crisis that I experienced when I was 12-years-old has me obsessed with writing stories to help families in Sierra Leone and in the diaspora talk to their young children about the Covid19 Coronavirus.

During the civil war in Sierra Leone, there were these jets that the ECOMOG forces used to fly over our house and drop bombs to kill rebels. Even though my grandmother used to say it was happening far away, the vibration on our house by the sea always made me feel they were close enough to me.

When I moved to the US in 1998 we lived next to Andrews Airforce Base and for the first two years every time a plane was landing or taking off I thought I was going to die. If I was deep in sleep I would jump up in bed. The vibrations and the noise always carried me back to the war. It took me a long time to find a new normal where planes taking off and landing didn’t trigger fear and anxiety.

I’ve always believed that I would have suffered less anxiety and post-traumatic stress disorder if only the adults in our family would have found a way to talk to me to help me cope. We have to talk to our children, to be open with them for better or worse.

Here he is gossiping about how Charity burnt the chocolate chip cookies. He told me not to tell her. Meanwhile she is in the room and can hear him.

As Olu, and I find a new normal of parenting via Facetime and indefinite separation I wanted to do something to remind families in our community to talk to their children. I know that our way, the custom is to believe that children cant understand and so there are many conversations that just don’t happen. There also isn’t widespread awareness around mental health for adults and certainly not children.

Olu is going to be fine. He understands what the virus is as much as a 4-year-old can. He is full of joy and he is surrounded by women who love him as much as I do if not more so (hi Mom). Here in Sierra Leone, I know from experience that there are many children who will not be fine when this is all done because we don’t make it a point to talk them. So that’s why I’ve brought Bra Spider and His Friends from the Animal Village back to life. These characters have been used to pass on morals and teach us lessons from one generation to the next. They are as useful and relevant as they ever were and can make it possible for us to have conversations and dialogue during this pandemic.

So far I’ve written two stories both related to COVID-19 prevention. In the third story which is currently in draft, I’m using the same animal characters to highlight the dangers lurking for children, girls especially during this indefinite closure of schools in Sierra Leone. Sexual predators and child rapists will use this time to groom and abuse girls so I’m writing a story that encourages girls to speak up, teach the signs of grooming, and asks the family to support girls who speak up. Yes, all of this in a Sierra Leonean children’s folktale.

Audio recording session with some members of my team and Steph my room mate. All of them first time voice actors but so dedicated to bringing the characters to life! We have had to shut down temporarily until I figure out a way to keep paying salari… — Audio recording session with some members of my team and Steph my room mate. All of them first time voice actors but so dedicated to bringing the characters to life! We have had to shut down temporarily until I figure out a way to keep paying salaries but I love and miss my team. I shed tears for them too.

So far all the stories I’ve written are in Krio. Once I write them my team and I produce the stories as audio keeping in line with Sierra Leone’s culture of oral storytelling. Producing the stories on audio also means they get a wider reach. So far two radio stations; 98.1 Radio Democracy, and 103.5 Afriradio have played the stories on air making it possible for thousands of families nationwide to hear how Bra Spider is coping with Covid-19. Additionally, I’ve used Facebook and Whatsapp as distribution channels.

So yes this crisis is kicking my butt emotionally, and mentally. I’ve given up trying to predict when I’ll be home to see my son again. I’ve committed to crying freely and without shame whenever I miss him or anyone else I love that this crisis has separated me from. And after a good hearty cry, I channel my angst and heartache into the one thing that always helps me make sense of myself and my world…writing.